So I went to the doctor and come to find out, there is a thought that I might have a cyst or tumor on my brain.
So this picture is beyond appropriate.
Now I don’t think I actually ate the brain tumor but considering the girl above made that comment then died a couple of years later from a brain tumor, the irony of me dying from that after posting this would be …
Hilarious.
See if I don’t laugh, I’m just gonna cry. I’m scared. I thought I finally was at a place with my health that I could handle. Yes my pain is at a 10 always but it’s ok. I can manage that with mediation, funny movies or movies where people are violently murdered, or just playing with the baby or Sam.
I’ve rescheduled my visit now 3 times. Part of me doesn’t want to know why I’m having grand mal seizures a few times a week. I just want to handle it like I always do by just pretending it doesn’t matter or exist.
But I can’t do that. I have a husband, who loves me and cares for me, who is sober and has been for weeks now. I have 2 daughters that are the loves of my life. Sam is 17 now and Zadie turns one soon. I have two dogs that would probably get over me fast but I love the little bastards anyways.
So I’m setting the appointment this week. I’m waiting for my phone to come in so I’m not bored as hell in the hospital while they run the tests.
For the many that probably hate me, your wishes may come true and you can hug your voodoo priests or priestesses for their magic working. For those that like me, please keep my family in your thoughts. Not me. I’m used to shitty news about my life – it destroys them when something new happens.
This is why I’ve been absent from here and not posting. I’ve been trying to deal and then remembered this morning the best way I deal is by writing out my feelings.Who would have thought a girl that kept her livejournal updated up to 10 times a day likes to blog her feelings?
So now it’s naptime and medication for my nerve damage. I shall return.
thegirlinthespongebobpajamas 